Dear David Oglivy: I always noted you were dressed in a tie and sportjacket in all your pictures. Do you think dressing up for interviews is a good thing? how should i approach it? (name withheld), Senior Art Director hopeful

Dear (name withheld); American's are foolish. Apart from coming to Churchhill's aid, American's can barely seem to even concoct even the most rudimentary and fundamental logic. This reality TV thing is probably to blame, or Prozac, or other mood-stabilizers you people all seem to be popping like hop-heads. You see, we never had such fancy drugs; straight-up martini's were the thing that kept you level headed. Now it's as if quinine water were an endangered species, and olives have been replaced by 8-balls, or whatever it is you kids are putting up your noses in the backrooms of these dreadful shops popping up like measles across the land. Dressing for an interview? The answer is simple: of COURSE you do. your best 3-piece suit and pleated slacks and ascot is the only acceptable uniform during a first meetings. This is all too easy an answer. Black wing-tips or loafers on the feet. Gabardine if possible, in houndstooth. A proper cap and a simple but powerful color for the tie, in red or a caper blue. And for heaven's sake, keep the hair trimmed! I don't care if you are one of those fancy computer graphics types appearing on the scene like ravenous lemmings, best to put your Vicki Carr records away and get on with the seriousness and gravity of the situation. Creatives must not fall prey to the petty slack that will consume them; and the clothes make the man. Loosen it up later when you've secured the position with Dewar's or Tanqueray and Tonic with lime slices picked right off the tree in your office--now that's how to do it, man. Remedial. Next question?